Today I Learned…

…that armadillos always give birth to identical quadruplets.  (Thanks Hanna!)

…and that there are audio clips on demand on the internet of President Obama saying awesomely profane things.  These aren’t fake — they’re excerpts from the audio recording of his best seller, “Dreams from My Father.”  I wish I could embed these, but WordPress has some annoying restrictions on scripts.  All I can do is give you this link to where I found them — it has the recordings (language NSFW),  text transcripts, as well as the author’s suggestions as to when he should use that quote throughout his day-to-day presidential business.

Today I Learned…

…how a bunch of writers and poets either died or were found dead.  I don’t have time to reproduce the funny parts of the list, so I’ll just link to it here.

Any other funny and ineresting stories about famous people dying?

(…I’ll be back tomorrow with the Rulloff’s trivia wrapup along with a special “What I Learned on my Thanksgiving Vacation edition. In the meantime…)

Today I Learned…

…that Maxim magazine had an interview with Hernan Sanchez, the voiceover artist for the announcer in the Mortal Kombat series.  And they made him say silly things using his recognizable voice into a microphone.  Click on the link to find the soundboard that resulted.   (Hopefully soon I’ll figure out if I can embed it here.)

Today I Learned…

…that Stephen Colbert changed the key word in the opening of the Report from “multi-grain” to “vote.”  That makes me really happy.  Good for you, Colbert.  Attack that portion of your audience that is so liberal they’re disaffected or refuse to vote because they don’t believe in working within the system (there was a sizeable contingent of those at Vassar, my alma mater).

On a similar note: http://www.votergasm.com/

Today I Learned…

…what you should have been doing with your money over the past year.

If, one year ago, you had purchased $1,000 worth of stock in the following companies, this is how much money you would have now:

Delta: $49
AIG: $33
Lehman Brothers: bupkiss

However, if you had used the entirety of your money to purchase beer in aluminum cans, drank all of the beer, and then turned in the cans for the deposit (assuming you live in a deposit state like I do in New York), you would now have $214.

Today I Learned…

…that there’s someone out there who is brilliant.

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Today I Learned…

…what really happened to Abraham Lincoln on that fateful night.